I would like to take this opportunity to thank the Academy

For granting me this opportunity to thank

Everyone who made it all possible.

To those who gave me a chance to play this part,

In spite of an early critical consensus,

With which I concurred, that I was miscast.

But the auteur, perhaps seeking irony or shock,

Gave me an offer I couldn’t refuse.

Some have accused him of fishing for Oscars,

In the manner that leading men sometimes

Play freaks of one kind or another,

Only they say he’s merely reversed the recipe, but

Be that as it may, I have little concern about the motives

Of artists and gods; and, yes,

Some have protested that by playing a monster in a man’s role

The auteur lacked all nuance and humanity,

But what did I have to lose?

I’m more than happy to play along,

To play opposite the diva, dressed down

In her denim and dirty hair,

Slumming for a trophy of her own,

To be exalted by her complicity to the part

Or some semblance of a man.